School Rumble: Final Rumble
by Damon Baxter
Summary: One way in which School rumble might end. Monkey faction fic.
1. Part 1

Disclaimer: I do not own School Rumble or any other properties mentioned in this story.

What you should know: This Story takes place after the ending of the School Rumble manga and some chapters of School Rumble Z so there are spoilers. Also this is a monkey faction fic (Harem for those not used to the term). There are some crossover but they are not essential to the story (they are more like cameos).

**School Rumble: Final Rumble**

**Part 1**

It was the end for Harima Kenji.

Truth to be told he had always wondered how his end would come but he always thought that it would be… different.

When he was a feared delinquent he thought that the end would be at the hands of a group of bloodthirsty punks, maybe even a Yakusa gang. Or it would be in a fight with a major badass, maybe one of most feared men in the whole world. In any case he would go in battle.

After he met Tsukamoto Tenma he began to think differently. He thought that his end will come at old age with her beloved Tenma-chan at his side, maybe surrounded by their children and grandchildren. Then he would go in peace.

Of course he never thought that his end would come like this.

Completely surrounded by every person he has ever met (even his cute Tenma-chan was here! How could they involve her in this? Damn!) and even some that he has never seen (or at least remember), unable to do a single move to escape or defend himself (damn restricting clothes), with his own brother next to him, to ensure no funny business will happen, and face to face with his executioner.

The face was covered but he knew very well who was behind it. He could even picture the expression that the face would be showing right now.

He was divided on his opinions about this person… yes, this person was about to end his life in the most embarrassing way possible that any true man would have, but he could not avoid to think that this person was somehow being forced.

Of course they could have avoided the use of the musical intro when the executioner entered the room.

Then the god dam priest came and said the feared words…

"My dear beloved we are here to join this man and this woman in holy marriage."

Yes, it was the end indeed.

***

Sawachika Eri gave a long look at her reflected image on the big mirror in her dressing room.

Amazingly enough she was not looking at the expensive dressing gown she was wearing neither at her hair nor make up (even tough each of them took several hours to get "just right"). No, right now she was trying to look at her inner self.

It was not that she was developing X-ray senses (that's for Kyon and the SOS dan, but that is another story), it is just that she was trying to make sense of her actions and feelings.

Several things had happened and somewhat they ended in this moment. A Shopping trip that ended sharing an umbrella under the rain (under snow in one occasion), confessions (most were incomplete and way too many of them for her taste and the very few that were "complete" were cast under doubt) Sport events, Arranged marriages (real and fake) there was even a shogi game at some point.

But now, here she was about to be married to a former delinquent, suspected monkey, a man way below her status and stupid beyond comprehension (and she bet that his feet smelled too).

And then she found herself doubting. Was she marrying that big dork just because it was a challenge, just because he was the only guy not drooling after seeing her, or it could be because of the competition with Yakumo, that somebody else might be getting something that she can't have. Or could it be…

Several images began to flash in her mind, amazingly enough all of them were about Harima and she began to remember the feelings that she had at each of those moments.

And then she realized the reason why she wanted to be with him… and then made her mind. She would marry him and that was it.

The sound of the song "Here comes the bride" could be heard even in this room, and that brought a smile to her face.

"Wait a moment. Shouldn't that sound until I am ready?"

She dashed to the door just to find it locked from the outside.

"What the…"

Meanwhile on the pulpit a Tsukamoto Yakumo dressed on a white bridal gown, complete with a veil that covered her face and amazingly enough her hair, could just think one thing.

'I ended up doing it'

***

There are several points of view concerning Tsukamoto Yakumo.

You could go with the typical male classmate point of view: Pretty girl that happens to be smart but ignorant of boys.

You could also think like her friends: Good girl with a horrible luck in love.

Or even go with the point of some others: A silent girl with secret issues that might snap at any moment.

Being able to read men minds, having a ghost girl talk to her, slapping a girl for ignoring her older sister might make you think that there is some truth in that last point of view. But it seems that being chronically shy and completely dedicated to her sister were the real motivator there. Being a mind reader, speak with a ghost and slapping blonds are just icing on the cake. Thing is that as much as she hates her power one good thing came out of it.

She noticed Harima Kenji.

Truth is that his love for animals was the first thing that drew her attention but it was the complete mystery of his thoughts that made her began to think about him.

In the beginning it was curiosity, just as she was curious enough if she could read the mind of a cat that drew her to Iori. But in time she had a good friend in the former delinquent, and then one day she realized the unthinkable…

She had fallen in love.

She denied it, she avoided the topic, she even tried to ignore it, but it always came back to her one way or another. And that ghost girl loved to remind her that every single time they met did not help at all.

So when she heard that Harima was getting married with Eri she did not know what to do. In the end she might have resigned to things how they were if her classmates would not have come with a wedding dress and an ultimatum.

"Will you let him marry her just like that?"

It might have been the peer pressure; it might be some type of teenage 'acting without thinking' moment; it could even be that ghost girl temporary possessed her body. The point was that when she realized what was happening she was next to Harima (which happened to be as a still as a piece of iron while sweating like a pig), getting married in front of a crowd.

"So my dear girl do you take Harima Kenji as your beloved husband."

The words of the priest put her on the spot. Although still covered with her veil at the moment she would answer everybody will know that she was not Eri, and why the priest didn't say Sawachika's name?

"I…"

"STOP THE WEDDING"

Everybody turned to the source of the scream and there on the double doors happened to be a very angry Sawachika Eri.

Harima chose that moment to enlighten everyone with his sharp observations.

"Ojou?, if you're there then who…?"

"Tsukamoto Yakumo" answered the red eyed (and at this moment red faced too) girl while removing the veil.

"Akira, how could you have not noticed that she was not me?"

The bridesmaid Takano Akira showed her befuddled face (that in retrospective it is the same as almost every other face that she has) as an answer.

"Forget it, and you, how do you dare to take my place in my wedding?"

"I…"

"Wait a minute." Interrupted the priest. "So what does this mean? That you are the second bride? I didn't expect you until tomorrow."

"WHAT?"

"Well if you're getting married along with her I have no problem in doing a joint ceremony so, Sawachika Eri do you take this man Harima Kenji as your husband"

"Well yes, that's why I came but…"

"And you Tsukamoto Yakumo take this man Harima Kenji as your husband too?"

"Well… I do… But"

"And you Harima Kenji take these girls as your two wives"

"When did I got entangled with 2 girlfriends?"

"Check high school pal" screamed Yoshiyadama.

"Shut you trap you mother f…"

"No cursing in the church my son. So do you take these two as your wives or not?"

Harima began to do what anybody that knew him well enough would consider as a dangerous behavior.

He began to think.

He was engaged to Ojou and that meant that if he backed down he would be destroying his honor (he did not had it in the first place but Tenma-chan was watching) and Sawachika would be furious.

Then there was Imouto-san. He never saw her so desperate as to intrude in somebody's wedding to stop it, could she be trying to help?

In confusion Harima said what has been his trademark kind of answer:

"Uhm… yes?"

He answered in the way that will put him in the most troublesome situation.

"By the power invested in me, I priest Jiraiya declare you husband and wives. You may kiss them boy."

At that moment while looking at the shocked and angry face of Eri, the also shocked but embarrassed expression of Yakumo and the shocked and murderous glance of the entire assistants of church only one thought crossed his mind.

'I am so dead'

***

Part 1… Fin

To be continued?


	2. Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own School Rumble or any other properties mentioned in this story.

What you should know: This Story takes place after the ending of the School Rumble manga and some chapters of School Rumble Z so there are spoilers. Also this is a monkey faction fic (Harem for those not used to the term). There are some crossovers but they are not essential to the story (they are more like cameos). I also would like to apologize for any sensibilities being hurt by this story.

**School Rumble: Final Rumble**

**Part 2**

"TENMA-CHAN"

He found himself running towards the love of his life that happened to be dressed in a pure white wedding dress.

"Harima-kun"

She was there… waiting for him

"TENMA-CHAN"

Harima sped up even more and finally hugged the most beautiful girl that he has ever met.

"I love you so much; I will never let you go"

"Neither of us?"

"None of you"

"Oh hige"

"Oh Harima-san"

Since when did Tenma call him like that? And with different voices to boot.

Looking down he did not saw his beloved Tenma but instead he was hugging both Sawachika Eri and Tsukamoto Yakumo.

"AHHH!"

Harima Kenji woke up not hugging anyone but found himself sweaty, smelly and naked in the middle of a big bed in the luxurious room of Sawachika Eri.

"What the… it was a nightmare"

The tremendous headache that greeted him in the morning and the memories that came with it, made him realize that not everything was part of the nightmare.

"I got married with Ojou and Imouto-san."

He remembered the disastrous ceremony, how he tried to explain everything that happened (a complete failure since he did not know how he ended in that situation anyway) and how he ended promising getting everything straighten out today.

"And how the hell I am going to that?"

The headache was not helping him to think but at least it explained why he was in the state that he woke up (and trying to poison himself to death with alcohol during the reception was the only way out that he could think at that moment).

This was not the first time that he had got so drunk that he had no memories of the previous night (except those weird nightmares).

The first time was during his cousin's, Osakabe Itoko, high school graduation. He knew that he should not have drunk at all (he was a minor after all) but since it was a special event it was allowed. Of course he got drunk and, next morning, he found himself on Itoko's bed sweaty, smelly and naked (after a particular weird nightmare related to Itoko). His cousin was unusually quiet (and attentive) that morning. He must have made a fool of himself (well, more than usual) during the party, why else would Itoko be blushing so much?

Another time was when he visited Itoko at her college. He was surprised to find Sasakura Youko, Itoko's junior in high school, over there since she went to an art school that was far away from Itoko's. Since all three were reunited Youko recommended having a drinking party and, once again he woke up sweaty, smelly and naked on Itoko's bed again after a strange dream about Itoko (and somehow it included Youko this time, how weird). He remembered that that morning Itoko was again blushing up a storm and Youko seemed very bubbly, more so than usual.

One of the most recent involved Anegasaki Tae when he was 'staying as a guest' on her house. He confused the beer with the juice and, once again, he found himself sweaty, smelly and naked. Only that this time was on Tae's bed. She was not blushing so much as Itoko but seemed to be awfully sore, probably because she spent the night on the floor after he passed out on her bed. He remembered that in that ocassion the nightmare was about Tae. Strange drunken nightmares indeed.

So paying no more attention to his headache he decided to clean himself and eat something. Maybe the answer will come to him that way.

It was then that he finally began to think in somebody else besides him.

"What happened to Ojou and Imouto-san after the wedding?"

***

Tsukamoto Yakumo was doing the breakfast that morning in Sawachika's mansion's kitchen on her 'auto-pilot' mode, she usually did that when something was on her mind and, at this moment, there were several things.

The first and foremost was: what possessed her to do what she did last night? She had already resigned to Harima-san getting married to Sawachika-sempai. That morning she was drinking her iced tea before getting ready when her friends came and gave her the wedding dress with the question:

"Will you let him marry her just like that?"

And in that moment she decided that she wouldn't, she took the dress and went to the church. Sawachika-sempai was mysteriously missing and the organ began to play "Here comes the bride" and she just decided to stand next to Takano Akira (the bridesmaid) and go with the flow.

Of course at the end of the ceremony it required an enormous effort not to faint at the sheer realization of what had just happened fell on her.

Harima-san was trying to lessen the impact on the guests to not much avail, just a promise of 'I'll fix it tomorrow', done over and over again, avoided a bloody end of the ceremony.

After that they went to the reception ('Hey it's already paid' was the excuse that Harima gave). She did not drink that much, truth is that she did not had the incredibly weak resistance of her nee-san (but seriously, who else can get so drunk drinking cola?) but she had not that much resistance anyway so she only sipped along. Sawachika-sempai seemed to think the same while Harima-san…

Well, that would explain his behavior after the reception when they were alone. What he did to her… and then to Sawachika sempai… and afterward to both of them… at the same time…

Yakumo blushed. Maybe the little that she had to drink had affected more than she thought since she wouldn't have done what she did last night… ever.

And then she remembered what Harima said afterwards:

"I love you so much; I will never let you go"

"Neither of us?"

"None of you"

At that moment she received the confirmation of what she always wanted… never to be left alone again. And then… she blushed even more at this point on her reminiscing.

"Maybe not all was because of the Alcohol…"

So deep were in her own thoughts that 2 things were unnoticed to her.

One was that the breakfast was burning.

And the other was one Sawachika Eri standing on the door.

***

Waking up that morning on the complete mess that was her bed Sawachika realized 2 things:

One, she was a very bad drinker.

And two, she had married a couple of perverts.

Ok, she expected that Harima was a little bit perverted if half of the things that were said about him were true (she never have dared to think that all were false) but Yakumo boycotting her wedding and her… behavior last night certainly were unexpected.

Remembering the ceremony made her remember her initial plan after they got married: Make Hige pay for making her look like a fool on her own wedding. Yakumo would pay too but the main problem here was the big monkey that was now her husband. Although he had managed to distract her last night…

Eri blushed at the memories… okay, maybe she was a little perverted too but they were even worse!

Then she remembered what Harima said afterwards:

"I love you so much; I will never let you go"

"Neither of us?"

"None of you"

A she believed those eyes; those beautiful eyes that she had learn to love. And then…

The red on her face was practically crimson now. Okay, she was as perverted as them, but they started it!

She was thankful that Yakumo offered to clean the mess and cook breakfast (even if she had Nakamura and Masaru she would not let them see this). She did not agree on leaving Hige asleep but she would not wake him up either so maybe it was better this way.

She knew that Hige would try to fix this mess. She also knew that, somehow along the way, he would make it worse but she also knew that he was sincere in his promise to never leave them alone and at the moment she did not mind the arrangement (even if she would never admit it to anybody).

But she would not be the death weight of this… marriage. Oh no!

That was what she decided when she found Yakumo burning the breakfast.

"Yakumo… the breakfast"

Said girl quickly turned off the stove, unfortunately not soon enough to save the meal.

"I'm sorry"

"It's okay; as a matter of fact I want to ask you something."

She would not be totally supporting of this arrangement…

"Could you teach me how to cook?"

But that did not mean that she could not learn a couple things while being on it.

"Sure Sempai."

***

Osakabe Itoko was used to crazy things, being cousin to Harima Kenji kind of forced you to it, but what happened yesterday was beyond weird.

But then again, who else would get somehow married to 2 girls in front of their families in the most bizarre way possible?

She was really surprised when he gave her the news that he was marrying Sawachika Eri, and even more surprised when Tsukamoto Yakumo interfered and also, somehow got married to the doofus.

She was angry to several things in that situation but one of the main reasons was that she also had feelings for the big lug.

She had them since they were both very young, she could not explain them but there was something in the way that he acted that showed that he was more pure, innocent and noble that he let other people notice.

Of course she knew that these feelings would lead to nowhere since they were family and he was head over heels in love with another girl anyway.

In that regard she was not much different to the other 2 younger girls.

While she was thinking about this her phone rang.

"Hello… Kenji-kun?"

***

Apollo Justice had to deal with several strange things in his life. Especially since he was working for a certain Phoenix Wright. But this one deserves an honorific mention since his boss conveniently left for lunch as soon as he knew she was coming.

"So he is lawfully wed to the 2 girls?" asked the beautiful grown woman in front of him that introduce herself as the cousin for the scary looking guy who happened to be his client.

"I am afraid so, it seems that Mr. Harima is protected under a diplomatic agreement that allows him to practice polygamy."

"Up to 9 girls?"

"Seems like that," said the very nervous young lawyer "he is not the only one thought. There seem to be a boom of these things lately."

"But who on his right mind would grant this 'Jurai diplomatic protection' to this guy?"

***

"Seto-sama, did you travel to Earth recently?"

Said Oni-hime gave a very innocent look that, instead of relaxing, creeped the hell out of anyone that knew her well enough.

"I believe that I have… yes, but it was a short visit, noting of importance Airi."

Masaki Airi gave a sigh. Maybe if she ignored it nobody would blame her?

***

"Were the hell is located Jurai anyway?"

"Well I'll see what can I do about it, but this thing is Iron clad madam. Not even Houdini could escape from it."

"But such an irresponsible law, it should surely not be able to hold its own if contested?"

"You certainly are not familiar with our legal system madam. But I agree that is a very weird concession, even for a diplomatic law. Could you believe that if he chose it he could marry you?"

***

"My dear beloved we are here to join this man and these 3 women in holy marriage…"

Harima Kenji was once again in a situation so crazy that only a lunatic after a sleepless night could have come up with.

This morning his tiresome (and convoluted) thinking process in trying to solve his marital problems led him to his bright idea.

Dump the problem on somebody else and hope for the best solution.

Of course he chose his favorite problem solver: his cousin Osakabe Itoko.

How could he know that they would end up in another marriage?

Itoko just appeared at Sawachika's house in a wedding dress, dragged him out and brought him to the church.

He understood that Sasakura Youko would drive them, what he could not understand is why she was wearing a wedding dress too.

He did not even want to think why Anegasaki Tae was there, when she appeared or why she had a wedding dress on her too.

He also ignored the fact that a crying Tani Hayato was his best man.

He did not even want to think how it was possible that the very same priest that married him yesterday was conducting the ceremony.

"So my boy, do you take these three lovely women as you wives too?"

Never let be said that Harima Kenji didn't learn from his mistakes. He knew the answer that he should give this time to avoid problems…

"I…"

And one scary look from Itoko told him what SHOULD be his answer.

"… do?"

"Now I, priest Jiraiya, pronounce you husband and wives... again. Lucky boy you may kiss the brides."

Ignoring the cheering hug that Tae gave him, the possessive tug from Itoko and the creepy leer that Youko gave him and while thinking what he would say to Ojou and Imouto-san one thought crossed Harima's mind.

'At least I know that with Itoko and Youko there would be enough alcohol tonight to poison myself to death this time.'

***

Part 2… Fin

To be continued?


	3. Part 3

Disclaimer: I do not own School Rumble or any other properties mentioned in this story.

What you should know: This Story takes place after the ending of the School Rumble manga and some chapters of School Rumble Z so there are spoilers. Also this is a monkey faction fic (Harem for those not used to the term). There are some crossovers but they are not essential to the story (they are more like cameos). I also would like to apologize for any sensibilities being hurt by this story (and this one has a higher chance than the previous ones).

**School Rumble: Final Rumble**

**Part 3**

It was noon and Harima Kenji was still in bed in Sawachika Eri's room frozen by something that was long over due.

He had begun to understand what was going on around him.

It was bound to happen anyway, even somebody as dense as him (and that's saying a lot) would began to notice the little (and not so little) clues to the truth.

It all began with the last nightmare that he had. On it he was on a crossroad, on one side he saw his beloved Tenma-chan and on the other he could see all his wives.

While his first impulse was to run to the girl of his dreams he turned to the other side and saw all of his wives behaving… oddly.

They looked so heartbroken that it was eating him from inside. It is true that some of them (namely Ojou and Itoko) had angry faces on them and seemed to be discussing about the fact that he had married, again! But he had got to know them well enough that he could tell that it was a sad kind of angry. Like the one he had when realized that Karasuma was the one that Tenma wanted.

He didn't want to see them like that so, with a big pain in his heart, he turned his back to Tenma and went to each one of them asking for forgiveness for everything that happened and being as supportive as possible.

'If only I could be this eloquent when awake!' he remembered thinking at some point while he talked to them individually. At that moment he only wanted to lift their spirits. He knew how much pain a broken heart causes and he really did not want that to anybody, not even to his worse enemy, so of if could help this girls (that he considered good persons and that he personally owed something at each one of them in some matter or form) to avoid it he would try it damn it!

The latter part of the dream had him… doing things… with the thankful girls.

The difference with this dream to the previous ones was that he remembered quite vividly what happened this time. While on the previous occasions he only had a fussy memory, now he had it on… well 'High-definition"

Next morning he woke up sweaty, smelly and naked. An usual occurrence when he had too much to drink (and last night he had his fair share to drink after the ceremony). But the behavior of the girls was… strange.

They all were somewhat subdued and you could tell that they were trying (very hard) to get along with each other.

Added to all of that was the fact that he could remember drinking after the ceremony but could not remember what happened when he got home (well Sawachika's home, but he found himself getting used to the place). His memories were: Ceremony-Drinking-Nightmare-Waking up.

Then he joined the point A with the point B and the realization that his 'nightmare' was perhaps… quite possibly… somewhat… REAL had him pale so much that he looked as his spirit had left his body.

"They were right… they were always right. I am monkey… no, worse; I am a scum bag looking for one thing and one thing only…"

He wanted to throw up, he wanted to cry, and he wanted his virtue back but it was kind of late at this point.

He also wanted to escape but that option was closed since he did… that… with them and had some type of responsibility because of it (what was this feeling, was it… a conscience?).

So he did the only other thing that he could think of.

He decided to remain in bet until he rots to death (it would take some time tough) or somebody kills him (higher chance to happen with the amount of animosity that he was creating). Oh! And get away from anything alcoholic… nothing good came out of it anyway and at this point he must have created a certain resistance to alcohol poisoning.

"Ano…"

His flawless plan got interrupted by Tsukamoto Yakumo who was standing by the door with an envelope in her hands.

She did not want to disturb him; he must have been tired after last night… activities. Also she did not want to tell him about… the incident on the kitchen.

How could a simple cooking lesson with Sawachika sempai and Osakabe sensei end in a conflict compared to a bio hazard emergency? She would never know. Hopefully by dinner the kitchen would be in conditions to handle cooking again. At least this time she had the help from Sasakura sensei and Anegasaki sensei to fix everything.

But she digresses, that was not the reason why she was here.

"Uhm… sorry to disturb you Harima-san but this came for you in the morning mail."

"Uh… Thanks Imouto-san" He found very hard to speak with her with last night's memories still fresh on his mind.

"I… have to go… see you later." She was on the same position. But the need to get back to the kitchen and help with current situation had priority.

"Sure." He took the envelope from Imouto-san and saw her leave quickly the room.

The envelope was addressed to him and looked very fancy, like a sort of invitation or something like that.

"Let's see what this is abou… EHHH!"

He was right. It was an invitation. To Hanai Haruki's wedding… With Sou Mikoto, Takano Akira and Inaba Miki.

Now Harima Kenji was in a predicament, he really did not have that much appreciation for old four eyes, not enough to consider him a friend anyway, but enough to respect him and realize that he could not let him do that.

He did not know of the horrors of being in a multi-wives marriage. He had to warn him, he was the voice of experience this time (well, there is a first time for everything, isn't it?).

So he decided to go and give him a piece of his mind and, after that, if he still wanted to get married… well it was his problem then. He would have warned him already and with that his conscience would leave him alone (he was even more surprised in realizing that he had a conscience, would the wonders never cease?).

***

"Girls, I am leaving but I'll be back before dinner." Said Harima. already dressed and ready to go.

"Ok, take your time hige, all that you need." Said Sawachika Eri who suddenly appeared from the kitchen. She had her clothes and face dirty and was carrying a fire extinguisher in one hand and a handgun in the other.

Before he could ask her what happened some voices were heard from the kitchen.

"It… It is still moving Osakabe-sensei."

"Youko did you finish to reload my shotgun?"

"Almost done sempai."

"Be careful with it or your wound will open again."

"Sawachika we need something to control the fire."

"What is going on here?" asked a stupefied Harima.

"Nothing, nothing at all so go wherever you have to go and take your time."

"Ok, see you later."

"Yeah, much, much later, ok?" said Eri while pushing him out of the house.

As soon as the door closed he could make out some commotion inside.

"I am back, what happened?"

"Seems that the little bastard has more fight in him that we thought but let's see him deal with this."

BANG

"COME BACK HERE YOU COWARD LITTLE PIECE OF BREAKFAST. I MADE YOU SO I CAN DESTROY YOU"

"I have your back sensei; Nakamura and Masaru are outside in case it tries to escape. Yakumo, try to control the fire with this."

"Will do sempai."

"Youko, go and help Yakumo and remember to let us know if you see it."

"Sure thing!"

"Careful all of you and remember to tell me if you get hurt. I am a certified nurse after all, remember?"

At this point Harima decided to do the wise thing for once and not return until later.

"THERE IT IS"

BANG

"SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND"

A hell of a lot later.

***

"I still do not feel that this is right, besides it is getting kind of late and he has yet to come."

"Do not worry priest, he will be here soon."

"FOUR EYES"

"And there he is."

When he arrived at the church Harima found everything as he expected.

Four eyes was standing in front of the priest (damn it! is the same bastard that married him… twice. What kind of man of the cloth is him?) with the 3 girls that were mentioned in the invitation.

"Four eyes I call to your common sense. Think it over, do not do it."

"I already did Harima, and I have decided to do it."

"Are you sure? Do not let one wrong choice ruin your life."

"I fail to see how this could ruin my life Harima, but I am a man of my word and have decided to go trough it."

"Very well, you made your choice. But remember that I tried to warn you first."

"Uhm… sure... and now, please, can we continue with the ceremony?"

"Go ahead," Said Harima not leaving Hanai side, "do not let me interrupt you."

"You heard him, please father, begin."

"Very well… My dear beloved we are here…" as Harima began to turn around and leave Hanai grabbed his arm to keep him in place.

"… to join this man, Harima Kenji, and these 3 women in holy marriage."

It took Harima a full minute to realize what the priest said.

"What? I am the groom? What about four eyes?"

"I am the best man of course. I gave my word of a man to Takano-kun that I would be your best man for this ceremony. Even thought you have already married my dear Yakumo-kun and to other 4 girls I fully intend to fulfill my promise, no matter how much of a pervert you ended up being, as long as Yakumo-kun and the others do not complain I will not interfere."

"That doesn't make any sense. And you…" he pointed to the 3 aforementioned girls (forgetting that pointing is bad manners, but this is Harima 'what are manners?' Kenji) "you want to marry me?"

"Sure, that's why we are here." Answered Takano Akira next to a red faced Sou Mikoto who just nodded (and strangely just muttered under her breath something like 'it better bring his memory back') and a happily jumping Inaba Miki.

"But… but that isn't right."

"That's exactly what I was telling them my son." Added priest Jiraiya

"Thank you father!" said Harima, almost forgiving the father for marrying him to the other 5 girls.

"Of course! Today you should marry 4 girls instead of only 3. That would make this wedding, compared to the previous ones, completely anti-climatic!"

"I agree! Huh?" said Harima, once again opening his mouth before his thinking process was completed.

"So, who else wants to marry him?"

"Would that mean that I would be co-wife with Yakumo?" said one of the nuns present to the ceremony.

"Of course you would be! My dear child."

"Then I will marry him!" said a bubbly Sarah Adiemus.

"But she is a nun!"

"And I just granted her permission to marry you, so no problem!"

"Ah… uh…" Harima made his best impression of a goldfish (trademarked after trying to help Tenma in an exam) as an answer.

"Very well then I suppose, my boy, that you would want the super ultra short version of this ceremony so you can go quickly to the fun part, he he he. Do you all 4 take this lucky guy as your husband?"

"We do!" chorused the 4.

"And you my boy."

"Of course that I…" at this moment Harima Kenji suddenly stopped and thought over his options…

If he said no he would still have 4 annoying slots for wives and those could pop up at any moment, anyplace and the amount of danger that his life would have would increase tenfold.

However, if he said yes then, with these 4, he would have a total of 9 wives and no more slots for future possible scary wives would be available (at least, according to his lawyer).

"Yes son, you were saying?"

Then Harima took a manly and confident pose (completely exaggerated of course) and answered:

"Of course that I do."

"Then I, priest Jiraiya, pronounce you husband and wives, once more! Boy you may kiss the brides."

Harima was just too happy about having a working idea that he began to kiss (wet and sloppily) at his new wives beginning with Sarah Adiemus (who responded to the kiss in a very un-nun way) completely ignoring that Sou Mikoto just had began to strangle a certain Takano Akira.

"You said that he was suffering the same type of amnesia that Hanai had and that the shock of getting married would cure him. Just like the last time!"

"It… seems… that… I… was… wrong." Answered the red headed woman who found out that speaking was somewhat difficult when somebody was crushing your throat.

"You were wrong?... YOU WERE WRONG?... OH YOU'RE GONNA PAY, YOU HMPH…"

Akiras's life was spared when Mikoto found Harima Kenji exploring her mouth with his tongue after he had finished kissing Sarah Adiemus and Inaba Miki, completely oblivious to the fact that 2 of his new wives were fighting.

At first it seemed like Harima had just signed his death sentence when she was wildly waving her arms around while he was kissing her but in just a few short moments of struggling Mikoto hugged him and began to return the favor by frenching him until it was him the one without air in his lungs.

It seems that a certain blue haired buxom girl was more than just a little bit starved for affection.

After finally been separated from his new over amorous wife, and while trying to get oxygen to his brain, Harima had a realization. He had just married 9 girls so no more slots were available. While it was true that no more scary girls would try to marry him it also meant that he had just blowed off his last chance to marry his dear Tenma-chan.

At this point Harima did what he always did in these situations.

He began to cry like a baby.

"Oh look, he is so touched by us that he could not stop crying." Said Inaba, completely missing the point.

While all of this was happening Takano Akira was just cursing her luck.

This was not as she had planed it at all!

It was her fault really; the plan had become too complex and involved way to many people for its own good.

But she had to take the chance, in order to get what she wanted.

You see, Takano Akira always considered herself a very cold person incapable of understanding love.

Sure, she could identify the tell tales of somebody in love but she had already resigned to the fact that it was something that she could never experience.

Then she met Harima Kenji.

At first he was just an interesting guy in interesting situations, a challenge to keep her mind busy, just as Hanai, and both were pretty much similar, except that while Hanai had very predictable patterns Harima was anything but. Even when there was something Tenma-related there would be unexpected results.

However, as she learned things about the former delinquent she discovered an interesting fellow. Although he had a rough façade and manners and a knack to be involved in misunderstandings he was a genuine kind and decent man. And then she discovered that she felt warm when thinking about him.

Could this be love?

It was certainly something new so she decided to test it with a known factor, Hanai Haruki.

She felt something about the upstanding guy but the more she knew him, and the more she could predict his responses, he began to be less interesting. Not his fault really but she needed somebody that would keep her on her toes. In the end she thought that she might let Hanai go and maybe let him marry somebody like Mikoto.

It was then when she began to plan how to get Harima Kenji.

The main problem was not the guy himself, just a signature in the right paper and voila, married for life. No, the main problem was the amount of girls that were already pinning for him.

Akira didn't consider herself an evil girl and she didn't look forward taking away the source of happiness for many girls (and in the case of Eri and Yakumo the only one that they were interested in the first place).

So she might not have got anywhere if it were not for a chance meeting with Lady Seto.

She knew about Jurai (she was proud of her information resources) and about their customs so here was a chance to really make things work.

Convincing the Oni-hime about the diplomatic protection was easy. After explaining the situation she willfully agreed to help. In exchange she just had to send reports (along with video and pictures) of the progress (it seems that Lady Seto enjoyed these kind of… situations).

Her plan was simple: Get Harima married with 6 girls of her choosing. She asked lady Seto 9 as a form of respect to Harima in case he wanted to marry somebody else (and also to counter some… unexpected situations).

The marriages had to be fast but also not all at once since that would call unwanted attention at the wrong time (not to mention a bigger chance at failure with so many people involved). The idea was getting him married 2 at a day in a lapse of 3 days. It would be fast enough and would take everybody off guard for enough time to get everybody married without problems.

The first 2 HAD to be Eri and Yakumo. Not only they kind of deserved it due to the devotion that they had for the guy (she guessed that if they did not married him both would remain single for the rest of their lives) but also would remove the 2 bigger obstacles from the line.

Getting Eri engaged to Harima was easy, just let one of the half cooked plans of the blond succeed and that was it.

Getting Yakumo to act was a little bit more complicated due to her personality but she had two big assets to work with.

One were Yakumo classmates (or the 'Yakumo support group' as Inaba called them) who once they knew the plan they willingly agreed to help. They even provided the dress and locked Eri on her dressing room for good measure.

The second was Yakumo's slow tolerance to alcohol. She just had to put the right amount of potent liquor on her morning ice tea (that she conveniently left on the fridge), careful of not putting too much to be noticed but enough to 'nullify' her common sense.

Combining the two she made Yakumo step in.

It worked flawlessly. She didn't even need to do anything from her position as maid of honor (she had secured that position in case something went sour).

Maybe that was the problem, she shouldn't have grown confident of her success and be less careful because, from there, it everything went downhill.

Itoko went to the lawyer as expected, discovered the diplomatic protection and decided to get married to Harima.

She had discovered her sensei's feelings about her cousin sometime ago. She also knew that Anegasaki Tae would be informed of Harima's legal situation soon after she discovered the double marriage and would gladly marry her dear Hario in a hearth beat.

So they were supposed to be the 2 that Harima would marry the next day. What took her off guard was that Sasakura Youko would marry him too. She had pegged her as a lesbian in love with Itoko that would never marry her because she just 'preferred men.'

Maybe if she would have known about their college days she would have been better prepared. Although the amount of care that Itoko took to protect her part made it not that likely.

But although the second day was bad, it was a field day compared to the third.

Originally she had thought that only she and Mikoto would have married Harima that day. Then, after being married to 4 girls (in pairs) would somewhat mellow him to the experience.

She decided to include Mikoto in her plans since she thought that the girl deserved it. With her awful luck in love she would have ended married to Hanai (who would not marry Yakumo, ever, she was sure of that). And she saw ahead of her a life as a home maker with the nice but somewhat dull guy (she thought that Mikoto most likely would end a mother in a loveless marriage while Hanai had very high chances of getting conned by a guy with less scrupulous than her).

She just had to tell Mikoto that Harima got amnesia and that the shock of getting married to somebody different than Eri would cure him. No reason that Mikoto would refuse (she is the kind of girl to help anybody in need) or discover the lie since it had happened before during the walking festival with Hanai.

What she did not expect was Inaba Miki getting married with Harima too.

But that was really a fault in her part for not have foreseen this. She thought that Inaba was interested in Hanai due to her behavior in the walking festival but she had forgotten that she was after Harima in the first place and that only stepped down and began to pursue Hanai once she discovered that Eri and Yakumo were interested in him too. So she should have expected her to join the fray once she knew about the possibility of Harima getting married to several girls.

Another unexpected addition was Sarah Adiemus.

Could she really be blamed of not foresee a nun getting married to him too? She knew that she was Yakumo's friend, appreciated Harima a lot and knew about the plan almost from the beginning. But then again, she had chosen that perverted priest to perform the ceremony. He was the only one really excited in performing the ceremony that she could find but, in retrospective, he was one to cause the most troubles.

She should have been more careful when he had the slip of tongue in the first wedding about a second ceremony the next day. And it was the very same perversion that made her hire him for her plans what made him marry Harima to the unwanted girls, including a nun! Well, ex-nun now (and with the way she kissed Harima, she doubted that she really wanted to be one in first place).

While she was confident that with the six chosen girls she could have a certain type of harmony (certainly not peace, there would be problems but she was confident in handling them) with these 9 she was not that sure.

In the end whom she really felt sorry for was Harima since now he would have lost the chance of getting married to Tenma. With the way he had been treating his wives so far she knew that he would not get a divorce (it would be more likely that he would die of fatigue or due to the crossfire between them).

Well… the possibilities of Tenma marry him were too low in the first place but she did not want to be the one that closed him that door.

"Wow! He has been crying for a long time now. Harima-san is more sensitive than I thought."

The words of Sarah brought Akira back to the present and place everything in the right perspective.

The reason why she wanted to marry Harima Kenji was precisely this, the unexpected things that happened around him, which would keep her on her toes, her instincts sharp, her mind always working, always forcing her to expect the unexpected… he was the man of her dreams!

With a rare genuine smile on her face she added the only thing that was missing:

"I think that I haven't kissed the groom yet."

She took the surprised groom and whispered on his ear:

"Harima-kun, from today onwards no more alcohol for you. I won't be wife to an alcoholic. Besides I heard that alcohol reduces a man… performance and from now on you'll need all the stamina that you can muster."

Before the surprised boy could answer she proceeded to surpass Mikoto's passionate kiss with her own.

Meanwhile on the surprised, stressed and oxygen deprived brain of Harima Kenji one lonely thought appeared:

"Why me?"

***

Part 3… Fin

To be concluded?


	4. Part 4

Disclaimer: I do not own School Rumble or any other properties mentioned in this story.

What you should know: This Story takes place after the ending of the School Rumble manga and some chapters of School Rumble Z so there are spoilers. Also this is a monkey faction fic (Harem for those not used to the term). There are some crossovers but they are not essential to the story (they are more like cameos). I also would like to apologize for any sensibilities being hurt by this story (and to not break stride, this one has a higher chance than the previous ones).

**School Rumble: Final Rumble**

**Part 4**

*****  
**

**Where are you?**

Sawachika Eri was in what many will consider her natural element. A luxurious party of one of her family's many friends.

Truth to be told she would be more comfortable at cafe Mercado with her friends or even… at home... with her new co-wives.

That thought brought a frown to her face (but this being Sawachika Eri in an important party even her frown was elegant). She was still mad that her new husband had gotten entangled to even more women.

What surprised her most is that she believed him when he insisted that it wasn't his fault. Not 100% but believed him never the less.

She was also surprised that her family's friends didn't make a big deal of her being in a multi-wives marriage. Heck, even a Middle East multi-billionaire old friend of the family said that he was glad that Japan was finally becoming a civilized nation since now allowed polygamy.

"It just shows that you are generous" were his exact words.

'Is every male in the world a pervert?' she was thinking in this particular evening. At least she was glad that Hige and she were the only ones to come at this party and none of the others had decided to tag along, it would make things… difficult. Generosity or not.

But then again, the way that Hige seemed to avoid her, and everybody else, suggested that it would have been better not to come at all.

And that was the main issue. With so many girls around, she thought her own flaws were more evident and made her feel… inferior.

Maybe Hige had married all the others to compensate for any fault in her.

"But look who is here."

So deep was she on her own thoughts that she didn't notice somebody getting closer.

"Oh! hello Shawn."

She did not know a lot about this guy, but what she did was enough to make a deep impression.

An heir to a powerful family, just like her, but his was a lot more influential than the Sawachika's household.

He went to the same school as her when she was in England. And after she came to Japan she found out that he had moved there too and was even going to the same High School as her. Not that she would notice him with the amount of skipping that he did.

She had heard about his womanizing ways in England and it seems that he hadn't changed at all with his exchange to Japan. She even heard about how he pursued Ichijou during the 2nd year field trip.

She knew that he was also Max's boss (another guy she met in England, also a classmate in junior high that was able to almost defeat Harima once). All of that made him a dangerous individual.

There was also the small fact that she was engaged to him at some point. Thankfully Harima's intervention put an end to that.

"Nice to see you again. Did you come alone?" He asked with his oily voice and white smile.

"No, I came with my husband." Eri answered in a very formal and somewhat cold way.

"Yes, now I remember that you got married. Congratulations! Were is the lucky guy?" He said in a very smooth way.

"Thanks. He is mingling around." Every minute that she was with him made her skin crawl. Were the hell was Hige when he was needed?

"Maybe you can tell me if what I heard is true. Are you married to a guy who has 8 more wives?" He said in an innocent way (that Eri did not believe even for a moment).

"Yes, it is true." She answered, still using his cold tone.

"It is also true that you're not using his last name?" Shawn said. His smile never leaving his face.

"No, I am still using my family name." Answered Eri, her voice wavering just a little bit.

"Funny thing. Some people may think that he only married you out of a commitment and he really does not care about you at all. That maybe he married all the other women because you were not good enough." He added in a calm tone with the smallest hint of mockery.

"I…" Eri knew that she should not listen to the guy. Make an excuse and leave the bastard there, maybe using a shinning wizard as an answer to his arrogance. But the questions were some of the ones that she had made to herself too often lately. And that scared her.

"I…" She did not had any words left, her mind was blank. Her mind was focused on Harima at the moment. 'Where are you?'

"I think that the lives of my wife and me are our business and do not need the opinions of a pompous brat with too much time on his hands." Answered with a boom the voice of Harima Kenji, who happened to be standing just behind Eri.

"I was just asking a few things to an old classmate, nothing to be angry about." Said Shawn with a haughty face.

"I am not angry, just warning you. I do not want you the embarrassment of being pummeled by a girl. My wife has a scary strength."

"Would not surprise me. Even in England her status was too low to be considered one of us. But, what could you expect from a halfie?"

CRACK

Shawn never saw Harima's fist coming, the wall were he crashed or the two teeth that went flying form his mouth at the impact.

"I am sorry, I think your face was in the way of my fist but surely that small hit was nothing for somebody of your level." Harima said to the now unconscious boy.

"Do not bother in showing us the exit. We know were it is. Lovely party." He said while grabbing Eri's hand.

***

On the ride home both of them were very silent. Not a word came of their mouths.

KERPUNK

The Limo stopped and Nakamura open the passenger door.

"Ojou-sama, I'm regretful to inform you that the car has failed. The phone doesn't work either; it seems that we are in an area without reception. I'll go and try to get help. Please wait in the car."

Eri just nodded and Nakamura left both of them alone.

"Thanks for helping me." Said Eri, after a while.

"You don't have to give me any thanks, the guy was asking for it."

"But he had a point. Maybe we shouldn't be together."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you obviously would prefer to be with somebody else. You got married with 8 other women after all."

Harima was silent. She saw Ojou's eyes and saw tears. Was this marriage so important to her?

"Maybe it would be better if… if we just… HMPH" She was silenced by Harima's lips.

Harima never liked to see others cry. He might never admit it but whenever somebody was heartbroken and gave to tears he felt so bad that he wanted to help. He knew the tears of a heartbroken individual since he had shed them himself and the one that was crying this time was Eri. Worse yet, she was crying because of him.

So in typical Harima fashion he did the first thing that came to mind. And given what he had been doing with his wives lately he remembered what really made Ojou tick.

She loved small tokens of affection.

After the small kiss he just looked in her eyes (no sunglasses this time) and said the first things that came to his mind.

"I would not be with you or any of them if I did not really care about each and every one of you. If you want to be out of this then I will not stop you. If you want to stay, then stay. Do what you really want and do not pay attention to what anybody else says. No matter what your choice is I will support it 100% and if somebody disagrees with it they will have to answer to my fists!"

Once again Eri was without words and with tears in her eyes. She hugged the big dork and cried tears of happiness.

So, what if they were in an unusual relationship? Everybody had their kinks and her family was influential enough to just send everybody to hell if she wanted. Extra wives?, no problem, her competitive side had never backed out of a challenge before and sure as hell she would not backing off of this one. Besides, with these relationship, they were being 'generous' weren't they?

"Hey, Kenji-kun…" Harima, that didn't move a muscle when she hugged him (he had somewhat being used to kisses and hugs at this point) flinched at the extremely sweet voice that she used with those words (besides she used his first name, usually a sign of danger for his virtue). "Nakamura may take sometime to return… and we are alone…"

Harima just gulped.

Nakamura turned off his headset at this point. No need to listen more than what was necessary. He knew that he just had to leave them alone and they would patch things up. Now the main problem is that they would require some time to… do what married couples do, maybe even the whole night. It was cold outside and he didn't even take out a jacket or a blanket.

Well he was an ex-soldier and could endure it. Oh! The things that he did for his Ojou-sama.

***

**How should I call you?**

Kari kari

The sound of pencil and paper was the only thing that could be heard on the room.

Kari kari

Only two figures were in said room. Both of them busy at work.

Kari kari

One of them was Harima Hario (Pen name of a certain Harima Kenji), a promising mangaka giving the final touches to his latest work.

The other was Tsukamoto Yakumo, his assistant and recently wedded wife, who was helping with the tones of said work.

While the room was silent the minds of both people were filled with thoughts.

The mind of Harima was busy with the details of his manga (when the hell he would not be in a pinch related to his work?).

But the mind of Yakumo was filled with worries about her new husband.

The problem wasn't that she did not love him, she still had the same feelings as ever and she doubted they would ever change. Neither was the fact that there were 8 other wives, she had always wanted a big family and in this way the house was always lively (she hated loneliness). It was that the mind of her beloved husband was still in silence.

Since she could remember she had always being able to read the mind of boys that had romantic feelings for her. She could also read the mind of her sister, who really was a mystery even in her own mind. And recently she had been able to read the mind of females that had some sort of affection to her.

The first female minds that she was able to read were her classmates after she confessed her powers to them. Of course they took it as a joke and the subject was never brought again but the power remained. With time she was even able to read the minds of her co-wives to her satisfaction (although she would have preferred that the moments were she could read them the best was not on the bedroom... when they were… with Harima-san…).

And that was what had her worried. His mind was still in complete silence to her. The only time when she was able read his mind was on a rainy day when they were working on his manga. He thought that she was cute… That moment made her a little closer to him but now, even after married, his mind was in silence.

"Imouto-san, are you ok?"

Yakumo realized that she had stopped working for a while now "I'm sorry. I just... I'm sorry."

"No problem Imouto-san. If you're tired you can rest. We're almost finished anyway. It seems that for the first time I will actually deliver a chapter early! So you can take a break, I'll finish the work."

"No, I'm fine Harima-san. I just spaced out for a while; I'll get back to work."

"Good… by the way, do not call me Harima-san anymore, we're married now. No need to be so formal."

"Sorry Harima-sa… Sorry." Yakumo blushed at her slip of tongue. "Ehm… How should I call you?"

"Hmm… You know I really liked the way that you called me last night."

Yakumo blushed a deep crimson now "M-M-My Lo-Lo-Lord a-and Ma-Ma-Master, ple-ple-please or-order this low-lowly ser-servant of you-yours what-whateve…"

"NO, NO THAT." Screamed Harima, red faced too. "I meant earlier. When you were talking with my mother over the phone."

Yakumo blushed so much that most of her blood should be allocated on her face at this point. Of course he was talking about when she was on the phone with his mother! She found herself using the same name that his mother used for him while talking with her.

"You mean… Kenji?"

"Yeah, that's right. Call me like that."

"Ok, Kenji." She said with a small smile.

Harima also had a smile on his face. 'Imouto-san is so cute. I felt bad since she was kind of distant lately but now she seems all better. Be happy Imouto-san, a smile really suits you the best.'

Yakumo gasped in surprise and opened her eyes as wide as she could. 'I can read him! I can read his toughts! That means…'

"Imouto-san are you ok?" said a worried Harima. 'What is wrong Imouto-san? Tell me what it is and I'll do whatever is in my power to help you. You can count on it!' he added on his mind.

"I am fine; really, I am fine Kenji-san." Said Yakumo smiling once again noticing that she could still read his toughts.

"You sure?" he said 'Imouto-san do not keep anything inside you. I want to help you. I want to see you happy.'

The eyes of Yakumo were watering now. He was worried about her! She knew that he had a kind heart! And now that she could read his mind she had all the proof that she needed.

"I've never been happier, Kenji-sama."

"Ok… if you say so" said an increasingly worried Harima. 'If she says that she is fine then I will no doubt her but… look at that face! She seems to be about to… I do know… explode or something, if only there were something I could do...'

Yakumo could not contain herself anymore and tackled Harima to the floor.

"My lord and master…" said in a voice reserved only for him "… Order me. Please order this lowly servant of yours whatever you want."

Harima was so shocked that he could not articulate one word but he didn't need to. Yakumo made good use of the fact that she could read the very male Harima's mind to good effect that day and several to come.

Needless to say afterwards Harima had to pull an all-nighter to finish his manga in time, again.

***

**Do you remember?**

Harima Kenji was glad to have chosen the profession of a Mangaka.

It was not for the money. He wasn't earning that much but at least his manga was selling.

It was not for the fame either. Although Harima Hario was a known name now it still had a long way to go to reach the popularity of… say Karasuma.

No. He was thankful of the free time that it provided to him.

Ok, maybe 'free' wasn't the right word. With 9 wives almost all of his time was spent dealing with them and their needs but if he had a normal job, one that required him to be in an office for most of the day, he would not have the time to be with them. Hmm… maybe he shouldn't be as thankful as he was of the job.

In any case now was one of those rare moments when he was alone. No wives around to mess things up. So he decided to relax and play some songs in his old guitar. Experience should have taught him that this was just the calm before the storm and he should have been more alert but… well, you know Harima Kenji.

While he was in the middle of an old English song that he learned ages ago he noticed a figure that have been watching him silently for a while now.

"Itoko! Nobody told you that are bad manners to spy on people?"

"Can't a wife keep an eye on her husband during a peaceful day?"

"Well it gives me the creeps. I'm not playing anymore."

"Don't be like that, it was very good. You know that I like the Beatles."

"Well I don't care, I'm stopping now."

"That won't make leave you know."

"…"

Truth to be told Itoko felt like leaving but she just wanted to be with him today. As far back as she could remember she always cared about her cousin but whenever she tried to get closer he would become this living wall that never let anything get near.

She was secretly happy when he came to stay with her at her apartment when he entered high school. She was also surprised when she found out he was in love of Tenma. She wanted to meet the girl that finally managed to open him up.

So she helped him to get closer to her. But she also had to admit she was kind of jealous of Tenma so whenever he tried something to forget about Tenma she helped too. Although sending him to Angola on the walking festival's day perhaps had been a little bit too much.

Now she had what she always wanted. She was married to him. There was the little detail that there were 8 more wives but she could live with that since they were together.

So… why she was not satisfied?

She was happy. The happiest that she could remember have ever been but the problem resided in that he was still the same wall. Not allowing her to get closer. Well… Maybe not the same 'wall', now he was more open, more relaxed. But emotionally he still remained at an arm's reach.

Why she had to fall for somebody like him? Why she wanted to be so close to somebody so alienated emotionally?

Then she remembered…

"Do you remember?"

"Remember what?" asked Harima. Both had been quiet for a time now and she asked that question in almost a whisper.

"Do you remember that Christmas? The first time that you met Tsukamoto Tenma."

Harima put a serious face. He remembered that chaotic Christmas. He was ashamed on the fact that he didn't associate that time with his dear Tenma-chan until a long time afterwards. But he remembered.

"Yeah, I was such a stupid kid, what about that? Want to make fun of me?"

"No, I wouldn't need that to make fun of you anyway." Harima winced. "No I just remembered talking with Yakumo about it the other day."

Harima entered in a state of panic. He remembered having slapped Imouto-san at that time, she had screamed at Tenma and he just reacted to that. He had been very sorry afterwards, when he first remembered that Christmas and realized that the Tsukamotos were the ones he helped on that time. He was so ashamed that he went and begged Imouto-san to forgive him. She did forgive him but if Itoko realized what had happened then…

"Do not worry. Yakumo is not angry about it and, if she is not mad, then I won't either." Said Itoko after reading his body language (not that it was that difficult to begin with). "As a matter of fact she is thankful."

"Thankful?"

"Yeah, she said that she was a very cold and rude person at those times but that Christmas made her begin to change."

"Because of the slap?"

"Well, that, and taking them to the roof to watch fireworks as a family." Added Itoko with a hint of sadness.

"I remembered that you were there."

"Eh?"

"Yeah, the janitor asked me the next day about your 'children.' It surprised me that you decided to become the mom in the end."

"I just did it because you asked me to." Said a slightly embarrassed Itoko. She thought that Harima never found out about how she convinced the janitor to let them in the school that night. "And I know that you only asked me that because you had no other girl to ask."

"You are right." Said an amused Harima. "But you know." Then his voice became serious. "Even if I had known other girls I would have asked you anyway."

"Now, Kenji-kun, do not lie to your wife." Said a slightly red faced Itoko.

"I am not lying. All my life you have been taking care of me even when you didn't need to. You are one of the kindest persons that I have ever met."

"I… said… no more… lies." There were small tears on her eyes now.

"And something else… even if I do not say it or show it very often… I am very thankful to you. And… I am glad… very glad that you're with me now."

Harima did not expect the kiss. Itoko just hugged him and kissed him. Not a soul sucking kiss, but one with a warmth that he never expected from his cousin.

"Kenji-kun… What do you say if we pretend to be mom and dad again?"

Completely clueless (as usual) Harima had no other choice but to accept.

***

**Want to bet?**

It is said that everybody has a Nemesis. There are some that even say that some people have more than one.

Harima Kenji was one of those.

He considers himself unlucky in having so many nemeses. They even came specialized!

There was his manga nemesis (Karasuma), his school nemesis (four eyes), his 'figther' nemesis (Max), his love nemesis (Karasuma... again), etc.

But he never thought that he would be marrying one!

Of course very few people will consider Sasakura Youko a nemesis, with her sweet disposition and all that. But that was exactly as Harima saw her.

She was his 'racing' Nemesis.

He remembered every single time that the bubbly woman had defeated him with her car. And being married to her did not change his feelings one bit.

So there is little wonder that one specific morning (so early that not even the sun had arisen yet) Harima could be found grumbling after literally being left eating her dust after a race with said girl.

"Wow Kenji-kun, wasn't that exiting?" Said the cheerful racer.

"How could I lose again?"

"Now Kenji-kun, do not feel bad. Why don't we race one more time?"

"Why? What's the point?" Said a crest fallen Harima

Youko hated seeing him like this. That was not the Harima that she knew and loved.

She had kept an eye on the young man ever since she became Itoko's friend and altought her feelings resided more on Itoko than in Harima she appreciated him a lot, more than most men anyway.

He was not the type that kept going woman after woman or destroyed whole families due their hormones. She saw him as a very nice guy who had a lot of love to give.

And after the 'incident' in college (that's how Itoko kept calling to the time when the three of them got drunk together in college) she began to see him in a more… 'Flattering' way.

So is of little surprise that when she found out that Itoko and she could marry Harima she decided to do it in a hearth beat.

So now she was married to her lovely sempai and the most decent guy that she ever met (extra wives aside of course, but then again she could not blame them).

The only problem was when he fell on those horrible depressions. Even if it was due to something as meager as a race she did not liked it and decided to do something about it.

"Want to bet?"

"Huh?"

"Let's make a bet. The one that wins the next race has to do anything the winner asks him or her to do."

"Deal!" said a suddenly hyper Harima.

And they raced again, Harima on His bike and Youko on her car.

"Ready… set… GO!"

Harima put his bike performance to the top from the very beginning. However Youko car was still ahead.

Close to the end Harima was about to call it quits when he saw an opening and decided to take advantage of it.

And he did it! He won! Now it was just a matter to think what would ask Youko to do.

However, when he saw the face on Youko on the rear view mirror of his bike his smile disappeared.

"Congratulations Kenji-kun! Now what would you want me to do? Maybe giving you a kiss or maybe convince one of the other girls to be with us tonight?"

"I did not win." Said a serious Harima.

"But you did, you came before me so you win!"

"No… you let me win." Youko gasped. "I saw your face on the rear view mirror when I was ahead. You face told me everything. Besides I should have known that the opening that I used was too obvious, one that you could only give me if you wanted me to win."

"… I'm sorry…" Said a sad Youko.

"It's ok, since you won, you can ask me to do whatever you want. That was the bet." Said a cold faced Harima. "So ask away, but no money please, I am kind of broke at the moment."

"…Then… could you… be happy?"

"Huh?"

"I hate to see you so sad, if is because of me or because something that I do please tell me and I'll change it… even if that means that I have to go…" Said Youko with her head down.

"Pft… HA!, HA!, HA!"

"Why… why are you laughting?"

"You think that I am sad? How could I be sad? And even if that were true, how could you think that is because of you? Please you are one of the most cheerful persons that I know!"

"But… just now…"

"Oh, do not pay attention to it! I was bummed just because I lost, that happens. Do not ever think about blaming yourself, if something I am glad to have a challenger of your caliber, it makes my blood boil of excitement!"

"Kenji-kun…"

"Now, back to business. You won so tell me what you want me to do but remember that I do not have any money."

"Well… There is something else that I want…" At that moment Youko gave him a predatory smile that Harima knew too well.

"Ehh… Maybe it would be better if we go home first."

"But I want my prize NOW!" And with that she jumped on him.

'Oh well it's too early for anybody to be around anyway.' Were Harima's last thoughts before he surrendered.

***

**How do you feel?**

Anegasaki Tae had to deal with a lot in her nurse profession (Yagami high had a surprisingly high risk zone) but this was new.

"I swear that I'm afraid of dying, you have to believe me." Said a paled faced Harima Kenji.

"It is not that I don't believe you but you must understand that is a little bit hard to believe that situation with you, especially after your performance last night, and the one before that and…"

"Ok, I got it, I got it." Harima cringed. If he could he would have preferred seen somebody else but his other wives would not let him since they already had a capable nurse at home.

"Ok, since you are so worried I will do a check up. How do you feel?"

"Tired, very tired." With a foot on the grave was what he wanted to say but he knew better than annoy his physician.

"Well that is to be expected. But besides that?" She said while checking his pulse.

"Sore, very sore, sometimes I can not even feel anything on my body. Not my arms, nor my legs. Not even my… nose."

"Hmm, well I do not see anything wrong here."

"Aren't you going to run some blood tests or whatever?"

"Oh no, we just received the lab results from your last tests and all were all right!"

"When did you take the samples?"

"While you were sleeping."

Harima face faulted. "So there is nothing that I could do?"

Tae saw the young boy with just a little bit of pity. She really cared about the guy. He and she were so similar… When she just happened to have her hearth broken she found him under the rain even more broken than her.

She took him home hoping to lift his spirits. What really surprised her was that the one that had her spirits lifted was her.

Very few people know that the ones that suffered the most from depression were not the ill but the caretakers, specially the nurses. In Hario she found an anchor that helped her to remain steady in a turbulent time of her life.

And now she was married to him! Ok, a little bit of trickery was involved but she did not regret her choice at all. She owed so much to him that she felt that if she did not help him she would feel guilty.

"Well… There is something that we might try."

"What?"

"Well, first we need a change on your diet, schedule enough rest and perform a lot of exercise!"

"Huh? Well… that does not sound so bad."

"I can even show you a routine that will surely give you a lot of energy!"

"Oh yeah?"

CLICK

"Why did you lock the door?" Said a scared Harima.

"Well… It's kind of private… We can show the others later but the first time I would like to show it only to you."

"A-an-and wha-what di-did yo-you ha-had in mind." Stuttered Harima while backing off from the nurse.

"I call it 'playing the doctor'" said Tae in a soft voice.

Granted it was a useful exercise but Harima did not find it that it solved his problems that much.

***

**Are you ready?**

Takano Akira's face didn't betray any feelings. You see, when you are a professional in this profession like her you tend to hide your emotions with a wooden expression and since right now she was in a mission she had to keep a cool head as much as she could.

"Could somebody tell me what the hell is going on here."

Having Harima Kenji involved in the situation did not help.

"Who are you?"

"I'm her husband."

"So you're the guy who she is always talking about."

"Huh? What did she say about me?"

Definitely not helping at all.

It all started normally. Well, as normal as a mission could begin anyway. Joruno, the heir of an important Don in Italy, came all the way to Japan to pay a visit to her but some men of Regino's family (former's Don Advisor, dead in a regrettable 'accident') followed him and then the problems started.

Even then it was nothing that she couldn't handle. Of course at that point a certain individual got involved.

What the hell was Harima doing out at this time of the night? It didn't matter anyway since he got in the middle of the crossfire so she did what she had.

She pulled her husband out of the range of fire and him, Joruno and herself were hidden… for the moment.

"So she says we are alike? I do not see the resemblance."

"Maybe she was referring to personality more than appearance."

"Could be."

"Could you please be silent, those guys are still looking for us."

"Sorry" Answered the two males in chorus.

"Good, they are moving. Joruno, stay here with Kenji-kun and I'll try to drive them away."

"Wow, one moment. You're asking me to stay hidden while you go and deal with a group of Yakusa?"

"Mafia." Corrected Joruno.

"Whatever, it's the same."

"Actually, they are very different."

"Ok, the Mafia. Happy brat?"

"Not really."

"You…"

"Do you want to help me?" Interrupted Akira.

"Of course, if you are going to fight then count me in."

"I will fight too!"

"What can you do brat?"

"You would be surprised."

"Oh, really…"

"Boys… stop it." Once again interrupted Akira.

"Yes madam." Chorused the two males.

"Ok, if you insist I will let you come but be careful."

"No problem." Said both with identical smiles.

"Are you ready? GO!"

The following scenes were a mixture of choreographed fight (Akira), clever strategy (Joruno) and Mindless brawl (guess who).

Next morning the police would find a group of foreigners wounded to inch of their lives but none of them were dead. Of course after meeting with a certain Morino Ibiki and a Mitarashi Anko in the interrogation department of the Interpol they didn't considered that a good thing at all.

"I will miss you Akira."

"I also will, Joruno. Remember to come back."

They were in the Airport the following morning. Akira insisted in seeing Joruno leave and Harima insisted in coming along.

"Maybe next time I will able to drink your famous tea."

"I will look forward to it."

Harima may not admit it but he had grown fond of the little brat. He had guts and brains; if he used them properly he would get far.

"Hey you, mustachioed fella."

"What? you noisy brat."

"You did well for a novice."

"You weren't bad for a brat either."

"Take care of Akira, or I'll make you pay dearly."

"Do not worry about that, half pint, just make sure to return here."

"I will."

With that he boarded the plane and left Japan.

"Do not worry. I won't tell anybody about your job. It's your call to tell them or not." Said Harima to Akira while leaving the airport.

"Thanks."

"But from now on, I want to know everything that happens in you life, capicci?"

Akira giggled "It's capisce. And yes, I will keep you posted."

"Good."

"As a matter of fact… There is something that you can help me with."

"Huh? Really?"

"Well, I always ended stressed after a mission and some people have recommended a certain something to help me deal with it."

"Oh yeah? And what it is?"

Akira smirked at that.

In a true professional way, Akira performed the deed in a very satisfactory way.

***

**Will you do it?**

Sou Mikoto was at the end of her wits.

She had 'accidentally' married with a guy who is also married to 8 more girls: 2 of them were some of her best friends, 2 were former teachers, 3 were her high school juniors and there was even a nurse.

To make matters worse her family just shrugged at the whole situation. Her parents were even expecting grand kids soon.

She could not find support from his friends either. They just saw her as a weirdo after they found out her marital situation.

Heck, the ones she went along the best were her co-wives!

'Partners in disgrace it seems.' She thought while practicing her kenpo on Hanai's dojo.

She liked it here. It was a nice place. She could relax hitting the crap out of a few boys and that would always lift her spirit.

She didn't realize how much that made her alike to her new husband.

"Hello."

And speaking of the devil.

"What are you doing here Harima?"

"Uhm…" It was not that was trying to imitate Yakumo but he was sure that if there was one of his wives that will kick his sorry behind at the smallest provocation that one was Sou Mikoto (Itoko and Eri too but he was kind of used to them). "The others were worried about you since you didn't come to dinner and asked me to fetch you."

So absorbed was on her training and her thoughts that Mikoto hadn't noticed that it was evening already.

"Ah great! now I even make you worry. What kind of loser I am?"

"You? Loser?"

"You really have no idea." She had reached a point were she could not continue anymore. "I never had big dreams, you know." She just wanted to let all out. "I would have been happy if I just married a nice guy, had a couple of kids, maybe have a small business." Even if the one that listened was the one that put her in this problem in the first place. "But now I am married with a guy that I barely know and have 8 more co-wives too."

Harima was surprised. This girl was having the same feelings as him.

"And to top it off I've had a horrible love life. The guys that I attract are just perverts or guys completely out of their minds. The one guy that I liked just preferred another girl, and I didn't even had the chance to tell him my feelings!"

Harima surprise increased. It was just what had happened to him with Tenma-chan!

"So what happens when I finally move over and date a more or less normal guy? He breaks up with me as soon as I made up my mind and decided to give our relationship a try." She was crying at this point. "So I guess that I must be happy in being married but it was not the way that I wanted it to be!"

Harima began to cry too with the realization that he just found a partner in disgrace.

"Do not mock me!" Said Mikoto while hitting him with her strongest punch.

"Ouch! I was not mocking you, I was touched. I know that is hard to believe but I understand how you feel."

"Please, how could you know how I feel? You are married with people that deeply love you!"

"Huh, what are you talking about?"

Now was the turn of Mikoto to be surprised. "Do you mean that you really have no idea of their feelings?"

"Whose feelings?"

Mikoto face faulted. "The feelings of your wives, you moron! Are you telling me that you never noticed how head over heels they are for you?"

"I think you might be misunderstanding things."

Mikoto grabbed him from the collar of his shirt. And spoke very slowly in order to make him understand. "I may not know much about the others but Eri, Yakumo-chan and Tae-san are completely in love with you."

Harima was shocked. "How could this be? Why?"

"For the record, I have no idea." Said a more subdued Mikoto.

"Why I didn't notice it?"

"Want my opinion? You are a very dense guy."

"Hey!"

"Just telling the truth."

"And… just to be clear… you are not… in, you know… with me…"

"Huh?... Oh no, no, no. Ours was just an accident."

"And… about what happened in the wedding night."

Mikoto was red faced now. "Well… yeah… you know… that was just… a spur of the moment thing… like a reaction… so…"

"No need to explain it."

"Thanks."

"So… If you really don't want to… you know… continued to be married with me… we can always get a divorce."

Mikoto felt suddenly very sad. "So… you don't want to be married with me?"

Now, while is true that Harima Kenji is very dense, when you screw it up as often as him then you kind of notice when you are about to do it again. And one look at Mikoto's sad face told him that he was screwing it up gain.

"No, no, no. I would love to remain married with you… but if you don't want to I won't force you."

"If I asked for it, will you do it?"

"Only if you ask for it."

"Well… I think is fine for the time being. It could be worse; I could be married with Imadori."

They had a good laugh at that. After a while Harima decided to change the subject.

"What were you doing?"

"I was just training… You know, you should train with me."

"I do not think that is a good idea."

"Do not say that. I've seen you fight, you only need some refinement in your movements and you would become really good."

"Maybe, but…"

"No 'buts.' I'll tell you what. Let's have a spar and if I win you have to train with me for a year."

"And if I win."

"Believe me, you won't."

And then the fight started. Harima didn't want to win but the idea of having his time cut short even more was a scary proposition so he fought to win. Which really surprised Mikoto since she expected an easier fight but she ended on the floor completely exhausted while Harima kept standing tall.

"How… How did you do it? You read all my movements."

"Four eyes"

"Hanai?"

"Yeah I've training with him a lot lately. He said that I needed to know how to defend my self in case I ever made you angry."

"He did that?"

"Yeah but warned me that if I ever used this against you for anything else than defense then he would make me pay."

"You know you really are like Hanai."

"Please do not compare me to him! I had to come everyday to train with him for hours to no end just to understand the basics! Damn tyrant."

"So you had to work hard to be like this?" said a mystified Mikoto.

"Not only for this. Almost everything in my life required hard work. Man I am surprised that I am not dead at this point."

Mikoto then thought things over. He had a decent man here, who was a hard worker (just as her old sempai), surprisingly friendly (when you got to know him), a dedicated guy (just like Hanai). Maybe he was a little hard headed (ok, he was very hard headed if not downright stupid) but it was nothing she hasn't learned to live with. And she was already married with him. So… maybe she could give this relationship a try. But, where to begin?

"Well, shall we go?" Harima's words brought her out of her thoughts.

"Uhm… I am kind of tired so why do not we just sit here until I get my breath back."

"Sure. Hey Tae showed me some massages for tired muscles, would you like me to try them in you."

"Why not."

That felt wonderful, his hands felt so good on her.

"Do you think it could help if I took off my gi."

"Yeah... I guess."

And it was true, skin on skin felt the best. She felt mellow, calmed...

"Hey Harima, you never told me what you wanted as a prize since you won."

"Do not worry, I do not need anything."

"But you won, that is not fair... You know... I have an idea of what I can give you..."

"Yeah? What?"

In the future when anybody asked her why she and Harima came until next morning she would stutter and failed miserably to explain what happened after the massage.

It seemed that at the end her craving for affection made the thinking for her.

***

**Do you want to play with us?**

"I tell you Haruna, it's great. You should come and Join us!" said an exited Inaba Miki to her visit.

"I have no doubts that it is Miki but I do not think that I should join." Said a calm Tougou Haruna while sipping her tea. "First, it's too crowded already."

"Oh! Come on! It's very lively here with all of us already! One more would not matter."

"Second: It's no legally possible." Continued Haruna not skipping a beat at Inaba's answer.

"You know that there ways to overcome it. Besides you could always be a lover!"

"And Third: I think Harima-sempai would have an aneurism if I do." Finished Haruna while taking another sip from her tea. 'Very good, wonder who made it?'

"Oh! Come on he would not mind, he is like the most coolest guy that we know." Haruna didn't even try to correct the possible grammatical errors on her friend statement. "Besides you didn't say the most important thing. That you are not interested. I bet that you are!"

"Pfth…" Haruna spited her tea, leave it to Inaba to find a crack in her armor, she might not look it but she could be very sharp when she wanted. "What are you talking about? And what's with you and this sudden Harima-sempai adoration? I thought you were interested in Hanai-sempai."

"You know that I was only interested in Hanai sempai once Yakumo and Eri-sempai put their claim on Harima-sempai. So how you expected me to act when Takano-sempai told us her plan to marry him? Of course that I would want to be in it too!"

Haruna sighed. This was almost a word for word a reprise of the argument that they had on the third wedding day (the one were Harima-sempai married Takano-sempai, Mikoto-sempai, Inaba and Sarah). Inaba insisted that Haruna should be the ninth wife but she refused to play along, it's not that she wasn't interested but doing it would be too cruel to everyone involved. In the end it was Sarah the one that took the last spot, for better or worse.

"Oh you were here, sorry to interrupt." Said a recently arrived Harima Kenji.

"No problem darling, just checking some things." Had to give it to Harima that he didn't cringed when she called him 'darling.' Of course being called that way several times a day from a very energetic girl kind of helped.

"Well if you need anything just let me know."

"Actually darling, are you busy?" Said Inaba while clinging from his arm.

"Well… I have some time." He didn't like the tone of Inaba when she said that. His alarms were blaring now.

"Do you want to play with us?" She whispered on his ear.

"WHAT?" Harima jumped. Doing… that with his wives was one thing (and he still wasn't used to it) but with another girl?

"Yeah, we want to play with your guitar. Would you like to play with us?"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Said a relieved Harima. Of course that they wanted to play the guitar! And this was Macaroni's little sister so of course she must know how to play! He felt ashamed of himself. His past experiences were making him a little paranoid for no reason.

Then Inaba whispered on his ear again. "Of course when Haruna leaves we can play our favorite game, Darling."

Then again, maybe it was not without reason.

***

**What should I do?**

Harima had never been a religious guy and after having a perverted priest marry him to 9 women it just cemented his ideology of 'staying as far away of the church as humanly possible' even more.

But when one of those wives was an ex-nun he was kind of forced in going more often than not.

"Please wait for me here. I will just go in and say hi to some people, ok?" Said Sweetly Sarah Adiemus to her husband in front of her old church.

"Take your time."

After Sarah left he found himself looking around (with an eye open for any possible perverted priests) and he happened to find a confessional.

That brought back memories of his youth. Since he had a deep voice even when he was just a kid he would slip on the confessionary and pretended to be a priest. He had such a riot those times. Then he caught himself thinking in doing it again.

"Why not? For old times sake." After looking around and making sure that nobody was around he entered the confessionary.

It didn't take long for somebody to sit on the other side.

"Forgive me father because I have sinned. It has been a week since my last confession."

The voice was a feminine young one. Maybe she was a high school girl? "Go ahead my daughter tell me what pains your soul." He disguised his voice a little bit. No worth taking chances in case she was somebody that knew him.

"Father I been a mischievous woman. I've been in love with my best friend for a long time but I couldn't tell her the truth."

A 'her'? This was interesting. "Well you shouldn't feel bad because of your feelings. Everybody would be evil if that were the case."

"The thing is father… that I also fancied the man that she is in love with."

A love triangle? He hadn't heard of one of those in a long time. Then again, he hadn't been pretending being a priest lately either. "So… you are full of love, well that is not a sin my daughter. As long you keep it under control. Because you have, haven't you?"

"Well…" she hesitated! This was good. "At first I did but… you see she is so slow! It would have taken years for her just to gather the courage to tell him how she felt." She added a little bit frustrated.

"Then this other girl appeared. And she was interested in this boy too…" Another girl? What the hell was this becoming? A Latin soap opera? "So… you see… something needed to be done."

"Then one day a friend of ours came with a plan." She continued. "He would get married with both of them and some other girls that were interested in him too… I wasn't included due to… certain circumstances… but in the end I decided to join in anyway."

Harima was flabbergasted. "Let me see if I got this right. You are now married to this guy and… one… two… how many more other girls?"

"We are 9 in total."

"Is it legal?"

"Oh yes father, completely."

"And all of you are… satisfied with the arrangement?"

"Well… I am happy. And although the others would not admit it immediately, you can tell that they are happy too."

Harima was speechless. Here he had… here he had… "My daughter! If it's legal and all of you are happy then is not a sin" Here he had heard the story of the most lucky guy that he had ever heard!

Poor girl, she was afraid that she had done something wrong. There was no man that would not be happy at having 9 lovely wives! (He never even thought about the possibility that the guy was possibly him and the girl was one of his wives… Yes, he is that dense).

"So… about these thoughts that I been having on my head… what should I do?"

"What thoughts?"

"… Naughty thoughts…" She said almost in a whisper.

"About your husband?"

"…Most of them..."

"Well it's all right, you are a married woman so it's ok to have that kind of thoughts about your husband. Now about the others…" Harima thought that it will be ok in doing that guy a favor "just include your husband and it should be alright."

"Really? Thank you father" said the girl happily.

"You're welcome. Go in peace my daughter."

After the girl left he also went outside. In order to not get caught (and maybe catch a glimpse of the girl) he walked around a little bit but found nobody.

When he returned to the entrance he found that Sarah was already waiting for him.

"Harima-sempai!" She jumped and hugged him so hard that he was sure that she broke a couple of ribs.

"What's with the sudden energy."

She giggled "It's a s-e-c-r-e-t. But don't worry, you're going to like it."

That night (and several others) Harima would be puzzled at the sudden change on the girl. Having no idea of how guilty he was of his own misfortune.

***

**What is it?**

Harima Kenji didn't considered himself a coward but lately he has been living almost all of his time in fear.

People might wonder why that would be, having 9 wives. But they were the reason why he was so scared.

Make no mistake, he cared about them. They have filled the hole in his hearth that Tenma left to the brim with their affection. He even admitted that he had begun to… love them.

But with the way they were acting… it made a chill go on his spine.

Ojou with her sudden changes of mood, Imouto-san with her almost magical understanding of his thoughts, Itoko with her not so subtle treatment, Youko with her calm demeanor, Tae with her everlasting smile, Inaba with her boundless energy, Akira with her aura of mystery, Mikoto with her determination and Sarah with her disposition.

Besides, he was not sure how, but he always ended with them… doing things… that really made him feel guilty (and tired).

He had become so paranoid that he thought have seen that perverted priest on his editorial talking about publishing a book with his gigantic boss. It had to be hallucinations, right?

Now it was the anniversary of that fatidic first wedding. He did not forget the date. How could he? Those 3 days marked his future forever.

However, these last few days before the anniversary things were… calm.

The girls were subdued. There hadn't been any fights or kitchen disasters recently. He had even been able to sleep for a full night!

So, of course he was scared. One year of living with them had taught him to be careful. His paranoia had been proven right more than once so he kept his senses sharp.

"Happy anniversary Kenji." Chorused all the girls that night during dinner. He had scraped to the bottom of the barrel and bought gifts to everybody (no asking for loans for this guy, he had had enough of borrowing money). So he thought that he was safe.

Time would prove him wrong.

"Kenji-kun, we have a surprise for you." Said Itoko during dinner.

"Oh yeah, what it is?"

"You… will become a father!" Said a cheerful Youko.

Harima's hearth skipped a couple of beats.

"And who is the lucky mother."

"Why, all of us silly." Said a smilling Inaba.

Harima was so pale now that a white sheet of paper had more color.

"All of you?"

"That's right! All of us." Added a beaming Sarah.

"Bu-but how? When?"

"Oh! Hario! You bad boy! You want us to be specific?" Said a blushing Tae.

Harima's brain worked on the subject and finally found the answer. Of course that they would be like this! He had behaved like a damn bunny this whole time, what could he expect?

"Are you angry with us." Said Yakumo at reading his thoughts.

And then he realized the truth…

"I am… so... PROUD. I AM GOING TO BE A FATHER!"

He stood up and kissed each and every one of his wives warmly. He might not be ready to be a father, hell he doubted that any would be ready for 9 children but he would take it on or his name would not be Harima Kenji!

"Wonder who would have her child first?" Said Eri.

"And I wonder who of us would have twins?" Added Mikoto.

At that point Harima froze in place.

"I would said that the chances of one of us having Triplets or even more are quite good." Said a smiling Akira.

"Suddenly I have a craving for Watermelon Ice cream with tuna, who wants to come with me?" Said Tae.

"Oh that sounds delicious, I will go." Said Youko.

"I will go too." Said every one of the girls at once.

Meanwhile Harima was still standing on the middle of the room, still processing the latest events.

"Hey Kenji-kun, aren't you coming?" Said Itoko while Harima's mind was able to produce just one thought.

'Oh my God!'

***

Part 4… Fin

School Rumble: Final Rumble… The End?


End file.
